Distract with ACCEPTS

When it helps

When you need to distract until the wave passes.

Examples

• Activities. Waiting on news that won't come until morning, you clean out the junk drawer. Your hands and attention stay busy until it's time for bed.
• Contributing. Stewing after a bad day, you text a friend who's been struggling to ask how they're doing. Turning toward someone else takes the edge off your own pain.
• Comparisons. After a rough week, you think of people coping with the same thing or worse, or of a time you got through something harder yourself. Seeing your situation in that light takes some of the weight off.
• Emotions. Sliding into dread, you put on a comedy you know makes you laugh, to create a different emotion. The laughter crowds out the dread for a while.
• Pushing away. A worry you can't act on tonight keeps circling, so you write it down, put it in a drawer and decide to deal with it tomorrow. Leaving it there lets you sleep.
• Thoughts. Your mind keeps replaying an argument, so you count backward from 100 by sevens. The math leaves no room for the replay.
• Sensations. An urge is building fast, so you take a hot shower or chew strong mint gum. The strong sensation holds your attention long enough for the urge to pass.

Where people get stuck

• Distracting indefinitely. ACCEPTS gets you through a moment; it doesn't replace dealing with a problem that needs solving.
• Picking a distraction that's easy to drift from. It needs to take enough attention to hold you.
• Choosing comparisons that make you feel worse. Compare yourself to people coping with the same or worse, or to a time you coped, not to someone who has it better.

When not to use it

When the situation can be solved now, solve it. Using distraction on problems that need action, or on emotions that need to be felt, keeps them around longer.

If you're thinking about suicide or are in crisis, call or text 988 any time, or go to your nearest emergency room.